I try to do the right thing, I really do…

 

So why when i try to be a good person do i constantly feel this pain. Let down after let down is becoming a bit bothersome to me. If only someone could see the knives that have been plunged deep in my back time after time. I have a wounded heart and soul, that should not be taken for granted and tossed aside.

 

As much as i enjoy helping people you would think that some good would come of it. But it would seem to me that i am in a category that should be named ‘Usable’. I am the person that you can call in the middle of the day, middle of the night or any other time, that would willingly come running to help you in your time of need. Is this not a good quality? Shouldn’t this type of person be adored and loved for being a truly dependable person? If the answer to either of those questions is yes, why then do i feel no appreciation for being dependable. . .

I have come to the conclusion that i shall no more be anyones ‘bitch’, ‘go to guy’ or any other title that depicts me as a person you can call on for help. I have allowed myself to be taken advantage of for far too long and you know what its time for some ‘me time’. From this point forward unless you are a person i greatly cherish and have sworn to myself to always be there for you are going to find out how heartless and unemotional i can become.

Your new true #1 Asshole,

Eric R.

 

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In other news, I sadly have to work the rest of this week. Yes, including the holidays. I do believe i have worked every holiday in the past 3 months. Even though i don’t have family to spend the holidays with or any plans on holidays for that matter it kind of sucks having to work them all. Mainly because everyone else is off work and nothing goes on so it is boring as hell. I can not wait for a new beginning at another place. I hope and pray everyday for the phone call telling me to put in my 2 week notice because something better has came through for me. I am in desperate need for some good things to come my way. I would almost go as far to say that i deserve it. But thats not really for me to decide.

 

Quick shout out at a couple of my favorite people:

Matt(My heterosexual life mate) ; Tony(lil cuz) ;  Mike(Newest and good friend)

There are more out there but I’m not going to say them all. But to all those people out there that i would call a friend, I am thankful for having you in my life one way or another.

 

 

Enjoy the rest of 2009 people. May you make 2010 exactly what you want it to be.